Tuesday, April 30, 2013

Coming to Your Neighborhood: Giant Animal Invaders

Many times larger than your average annoying mosquito, gallinippers are not only overgrown but aggressive. They bite through clothing, they go after pets and fish, and they hunt for food 24 hours a day, delivering blood-sucking bites that hurt more than irritate. Their larvae eat tadpoles.

See more species here. 

Saturday, April 27, 2013

So long as one person gets the joke. 

9 ‘Honest’ Disney Movies

More here. 

Morning with the dog.

Do you want to go outside?


No Thanks.

A Joke

The Sensuous (and Smart) Wife...

>>        "Have you ever seen Twenty Dollars all crumpled up?"...the woman
>>        asked her husband.
>>        >>>>>
>>        >>>>> "No"...said her husband.
>>        >>>>>
>>        >>>>> She gave him a sexy little smile, unbuttoned the top 3 or 4
>> buttons of her
>>        blouse...and slowly reached down into the cleavage created by a
>> soft, silky
>>        push-up bra...and pulled out a crumpled Twenty Dollar bill.
>>        >>>>>
>>        >>>>> He took the crumpled Twenty Dollar bill from her ...and
>> smiled
>>        approvingly.
>>        >>>>>
>>        >>>>>
>>        >>>>> "Have you ever seen Fifty Dollars all crumpled up?"... she
>> then
>>        asked her husband?
>>        >>>>>
>>        >>>>> "Uh...no, I haven't" ...he said (with an anxious tone in his
>>        voice).
>>        >>>>>
>>        >>>>> She gave him another sexy little smile, pulled up her skirt,
>> and
>>        seductively reached into her tight, sheer panties... and pulled
>> out a crumpled
>>        Fifty Dollar bill.
>>        >>>>>
>>        >>>>> He took the crumpled Fifty Dollar bill... and started
>> breathing a little
>>        quicker with anticipation.
>>        >>>>>
>>        >>>>> "Now" ...she said. "Have you ever seen $50,000 Dollars all
>>        crumpled up?"
>>        >>>>>
>>        >>>>> "No way" ...he said (while obviously becoming even more
>>        aroused... and excited).
>>        >>>>>
>>        >>>>> "Well go look in the garage!"...she said.

Job Description

Someone once asked me, what is your job?" I replied, “I am my wife's sexual advisor."Somewhat shocked, they said "I beg your pardon, but what do you mean by that?"

"Very simple. The wife has told me that when she wants my fucking advice, she'll ask me for it.

Victoria's Got A Secret

A Joke

Patton staggered home very late after another evening with his drinking buddy, Paddy. He took off his shoes to avoid waking his wife, Kathleen. ;
> He tiptoed as quietly as he could toward the stairs leading to their upstairs bedroom, but misjudged the bottom step. As he caught himself by grabbing the banister, his body swung around and he landed heavily on his rump. A whiskey bottle in each back pocket broke and made the landing especially painful. ;
> Managing not to yell, Patton sprung up, pulled down his pants, and looked in the hall mirror to see that his butt cheeks were cut and bleeding. He managed to quietly find a full box of Band-Aids and began putting a Band-Aid as best he could on each place he saw blood.
> He then hid the now almost empty Band-Aid box and shuffled and stumbled his way to bed.. ;
> In the morning, Patton woke up with searing pain in both his head and butt and Kathleen staring at him from across the room. ;
> She said, 'You were drunk again last night weren't you?'
> Patton said, 'Why you say such a mean thing?'
> 'Well,' Kathleen said, 'it could be the open front door, it could be the broken glass at the bottom of the stairs, it could be the drops of blood trailing through the house, it could be your bloodshot eyes, but mostly ....... it's all those Band-Aids stuck on the hall mirror.

An Irish priest is driving down to New York and gets stopped for speeding in Connecticut . The state trooper smells alcohol on the priest's breath and then sees an empty wine bottle on the floor of the car. ;
> He says, 'Sir, have you been drinking?'
> 'Just water,' says the priest.
> The trooper says, 'Then why do I smell wine?'
> The priest looks at the bottle and says, 'Good Lord! He's done it again!'

My philosophy for life is deceptively simple. I have been working on itand refining it for most of my life.
I am delighted to say that, finally, I have refined it down to its essence sufficiently to share with a select band of friends who may appreciate its elegance and simplicity.


Cocktail Country: Outstanding Drinks From All 50 States

Sunday, April 14, 2013


A Great Afternoon at Lost Trail Hot Springs

More U.S. Children Being Diagnosed With Youthful Tendency Disorder

REDLANDS, CA–Nicholas and Beverly Serna's daughter Caitlin was only four years old, but they already knew there was a problem.
More U.S. Children Being Diagnosed With Youthful Tendency Disorder
Day after day, upon arriving home from preschool, Caitlin would retreat into a bizarre fantasy world. Sometimes, she would pretend to be people and things she was not. Other times, without warning, she would burst into nonsensical song. Some days she would run directionless through the backyard of the Sernas' comfortable Redlands home, laughing and shrieking as she chased imaginary objects.
When months of sessions with a local psychologist failed to yield an answer, Nicholas and Beverly took Caitlin to a prominent Los Angeles pediatric neurologist for more exhaustive testing. Finally, on Sept. 11, the Sernas received the heartbreaking news: Caitlin was among a growing legion of U.S. children suffering from Youthful Tendency Disorder.
Beverly. "At least we knew we weren't bad parents. We simply had a child who was born with a medical disorder."
Onion Med Watch
Youthful Tendency Disorder (YTD), a poorly understood neurological condition that afflicts an estimated 20 million U.S. children, is characterized by a variety of senseless, unproductive physical and mental exercises, often lasting hours at a time. In the thrall of YTD, sufferers run, jump, climb, twirl, shout, dance, do cartwheels, and enter unreal, unexplainable states of "make-believe."
"The Youthful child has a kind of love/hate relationship with reality," said Johns Hopkins University YTD expert Dr. Avi Gwertzman. "Unfit to join the adult world, they struggle to learn its mores and rules in a process that can take the entirety of their childhood. In the meantime, their emotional and perceptive problems cause them to act out in unpredictable and extremely juvenile ways. It's as though they can only take so much reality; they have to 'check out,' to go Youthful for a while."
On a beautiful autumn day in Asheville, NC, six-year-old Cameron Boudreaux is swinging on a park swingset–a monotonous, back-and-forth action that apparently gives him solace. Spotting his mother on a nearby bench, Cameron rushes eagerly to her and asks, "Guess what?" His mother responds with a friendly, "What?"
Common YTD Warning Signs
With unbridled glee, Cameron shouts, "Chicken butt!"--cryptic words understood only by him--before laughing and dashing off again, leaving his mother distraught over yet another baffling non-conversation.
"I must admit, it's been a struggle," Mary Boudreaux said. "What can I say to him when he says something like that, something that makes no sense? Or when he runs through the house yelling while I'm trying to balance the checkbook? You can't just say, 'Please, Cameron, don't have a disorder for just a few minutes so I can concentrate.'"
Cameron's psychological problems run even deeper. He can name every one of his beloved, imaginary Pokemon characters, but the plain realities of the actual world he inhabits are an enigma: Ask Cameron the name of the real-life city councilman sponsoring the referendum to renovate the park just across the street from his house–a park he plays in daily–and he draws a blank.
According to Dr. Dinesh Agarwal, director of child psychiatry at NYU Medical Center, such disconnectedness from reality is a coping mechanism for YTD sufferers. "The Youthful child is born into a world he or she does not fully understand," Agarwal said. "Their brain pathways are still forming, and they need to repetitively relearn how to assimilate into society. These disassociative play-fantasies apparently help them accomplish that."
Debra Cottle of Malden, MA, discusses her daughter's recently diagnosed YTD with pediatric neurologist Dr. Amy Yuan.
But such fantasies come at a price, producing in Youthful children a disinterest in the everyday responsibilities of life bordering on contempt.
"Jesse knows when it's his turn to take out the trash. We've gone over the house rules a dozen times," said Richard Torres, a Davenport, IA, father of three whose nine-year-old son Jesse was recently diagnosed with YTD. "And still he neglects the job time and again."
Slowly, methodically, through an elaborate system of rewards and punishments, Jesse has shown improvement. But the road ahead is long.
"We get a lot of platitudes from the so-called experts," Torres said. "We hear a lot of, 'Oh, he'll grow out of it, just give it time.' That's easy for them to say–their kid's not running around the neighborhood claiming to be Superman."
Help for families struggling with YTD may soon be on the way. At last month's annual AMA Convention, Smithkline-Beecham unveiled Juvenol, a promising YTD drug which, pending FDA approval, could reach the U.S. market as early as next spring. Already available in France and Sweden, Juvenol, the Swedish newspaper Aftonbladetreported, resulted in a 60 percent decrease in running and jumping among users.
But until such help arrives, the parents of YTD sufferers can do little more than try to get through each day.
"I love my child with all my heart," said Alexandra Torres, Jesse's mother. "But when he's in the throes of one of his skipping fits, it's hard not to feel a little envious of parents with normal, healthy children."  

Alfred Anaya Put Secret Compartments in Cars.

So the DEA Put Him in Prison

Saturday, April 13, 2013

You can do what at Kmart?

You can too!

Saturday, April 06, 2013

Where's Doug?

It's going to be a long month. Might have to add a Bitterroot hot springs/brewery trip in there just to relax.

2,182 miles from April 1st to May 2nd.

Best concert I've seen in a long time.

Pinky and the Floyd

Interactive: The Geography of Abortion Access

The One Woman Screwing Up North Dakota’s Plan to End Abortion

She's the only abortion provider in a state that just passed crazy restrictions. And she’s not backing down. Winston Ross goes to the culture war's new frontier: Fargo, North Dakota.

> The human body has 7 trillion nerves.......my wife manages to get on every fucking one of them.
> ————————————————————————————
> I fitted strobe lights in the bedroom.They're brilliant...It makes the wife look like she’s actually moving during sex…
> ————————————————————————————
> My wife said that she was leaving me because I always exaggerate. I was so shocked I almost tripped over my dick.
> ————————————————————————————
> I went to the doctor’s office the other day and found out that my new doctor is young female and drop dead gorgeous.
> I was embarrassed, but she said, “Don't worry, I am a professional – I've seen it all before. Just tell me what’s wrong and I'll check it out.
> I said, “My wife thinks that my dick tastes like asparagus”
> ————————————————————————————
> I was pretty excited when my new girlfriend sent me a text message claiming that she loves anal.
> Dyslexic bitch , it turns out that she loves Alan, my best friend……
> ————————————————————————————
> A guy is watching a film with creepy organ music on the TV when he suddenly yells, “Don't enter that church, you damn fool !!!”
> His wife asks him, “What are you watching?”
> Husband replies, “Our wedding video."
> ————————————————————————————
> I said to the wife, “Get me a newspaper”
> “Don't be silly,” she said “You can borrow my iPad”
> That spider never knew what fucking hit it.

Want It!

North to Alaska

September 6-11, 2013, Exploring Alaska - Anchorage to Denali National Park with Cowboy Junkies and friends

This trip is now SOLD OUT. If you are interested in being placed on our waiting list, please contact us at trains@sover.net or 866-484-3669.
Join Cowboy Junkies and Roots on the Rails as we head north to Alaska and the heart of the last frontier - Denali National Park! Six million acres of wild land, bisected by one 92-mile ribbon of road. And this road less traveled (all but the first 15 miles are gravel, and forbidden to private automobile) will be our road. From the taiga forest at the Park entrance winding our way to high alpine tundra and snowy mountains, culminating in North America's tallest peak, 20,320' Mount McKinley. Be one of just 48 travelers on this incredible, once-in-a-lifetime journey.