As the 2013 legislature arrives, here are some bills that I’m told are already being drafted by certain legislators. Some I like, some not. You be the judge. (For those new to the Cowgirl Blog, referring to the 2011 Nutjob Bills may provide some context).
1. Joint Resolution of the House and Senate, acknowledging the earth is significantly greater than 6,000 years old.
2. Joint Resolution, declaring global warming to be bad.
3. Bill requiring all political funding sources to be disclosed, for all groups and candidates, period.
4. Bill requiring mandatory counseling prior to divorce, for candidates running in a GOP gubernatorial primary.
5. Bill forbidding any GOP legislator who votes to take health care from others from benefitting in any way from any aspect of taxpayer funded health care.
6. State income tax increase for large corporations and Montana’s making more than $250,000.
7. Bill to remove carbon monoxide detector in the Governor’s office.
8. Bill to require legislators opposed to medical marijuana to take a lie detector test, about whether they’ve ever smoked it, and how much they smoked.
9. Bill to require a posting, in Capitol Rotunda, of all federal farm subsidy payments to legislators. (Did you know they are mostly TEA Partiers?)
10. Bill to require school children to carry hand-thrown spears and guns with silencers.
11. Constitutional amendment limiting the number of legislative referenda to three per election with citizen-authorized measures with greatest number of signatures taking priority; and raising the vote threshold needed for the legislature to send a measure directly to the ballot, to supermajority.
12. Bill requiring security checkpoints at all public bathrooms, to inspect all transgender Montanans.
13. Bill to establish dog kennel on Capitol grounds, to perpetuate dog-friendly state government.
14. Constitutional Amendment to require use of branding iron by Governor when vetoing.
15. Bill to allow fishing with silencers (and semiautomatics).
16. Bill to allow legislators to be paid in gold dust, pixie stix, or cattle.