Led Zeppelin: The first three things you smoked were banana peels, catnip, and poppies, in that order.
Jimi Hendrix: You are under 20 or over 65.
The Eagles: You can only reach orgasm while listening to talk radio.Allman Brothers Band: You do not own a bong, but can quickly make one from a piece of fruit or an abandoned toilet.
Journey: You own those running shoes that are shaped like feet.
Lynyrd Skynyrd: You somehow have both long hair and a sunburned scalp.
Fleetwood Mac: You have snorted cocaine off a copy of The Hobbit.
