Sit, A Play In Four Acts

Average Dog Owner: "Sit!"
Average Dog: "OK."
Dog sits.
The End.

*clap*clap*clap*

Average Dog Owner: "Sit!"
Average Headstrong Dog: "Naw, I don't think so."
Average Dog Owner: "Puh-leeeese!"
Average Headstrong Dog: "OK."
Dog sits.
The End.

*clap*clap*clap*

Average Dog Owner: "Sit!"
Most Nordic Breeds, Many Terriers and a Smattering of Other Breeds (Henceforth "Dog"): "Naw, I don't think so."
Average Dog Owner: "Puh-leeeese!"
Dog: "HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!"
Dog wanders off and pees on something.
The End.

*clap*clap*clap*

Terrier Owner: "Sit!"
Terrier: "Naw, I don't think so."
Terrier Owner: "Do it. Now."
Terrier: "OK."
Terrier sits.
The End.

*clap*clap*clap*

Malamute Owner: "Sit!"
Malamute: "Naw, I don't think so."
Malamute Owner: "Do it. Now."
(the following exchange is on an almost psychic level)
Malamute: "Why? Because you said? Look Bub, I got family dealing with polar bears. You ain't nuthin'."
Malamute Owner: "Do it or I'll beat you with a stick. A big-ass stick." (The stick is a metaphor. Maybe.)
Malamute: "You mean that?"
Malamute Owner: "I mean that."
Malamute: "Oh."
Malamute sits.
The End