A Christmas Poem

To Kill a Snowman

Kill, kill, kill the snowman!
Slit its throat, pour its blood.
Cut off its nose and eat it like Bugs Bunny.
That would be funny.
Pull out the coal eyes and burn them to ashes.
Roll the eyelashes in window sashes.
Take his top hat and put it on,
Pretend you are Uncle Scrooge ... you're gone!
Smack him with a hammer called Sledgie
Yank his undies and give him a wedgie
Little stick arms, break them in two.
Jump on them, kick them with your shoe.
Take his buttons, put them on your coat,
Toss him in the river, see if he'll float.
Tighten his scarf, make him barf.
Steal his mittens
Feed them to kittens.
Slice him right down the middle
Bash the remains with a big fat fiddle.

-- Justin Bloch and Corey Lindstrom, Grade 8
(Who style themselves as two strange and greatly disturbed poets.)