Saturday, June 16, 2007
Friday, June 15, 2007
Thursday, June 14, 2007
Kayaking Big Timber Creek - Slideshow
With an average elevation drop of 720 feet per mile, the Big Timber Race — according to organizers — is the steepest kayaking race in the world.
Tuesday, June 12, 2007
Dog name, cat name or kid name?
" . . . The results show that, among these relatively high-end pet owners at least, “Molly” is the No. 1 name for both cats and dogs (as well as being the “Whitest Girl Name in America” as per Freakonomics). Note that “Muhammad” is nowhere to be found.
As Callahan notes on her blog, the pet list overlaps heavily with the same year’s 100 most popular children’s names in England and Wales."
As Callahan notes on her blog, the pet list overlaps heavily with the same year’s 100 most popular children’s names in England and Wales."
Monday, June 11, 2007
Sunday, June 10, 2007
This pretty much explains why I have not pursued advancement in state government.
The Minister’s Cabinet
(Christopher Bailey reports the Minutes of the April Council Meeting at St. Barnabas Lutheran Church, Blandville)
Mrs. Woodstock called the meeting to order at 7:12 P.M., Pastor Hamilton having been delayed by an unusually long line at Starbucks. The meeting began with the reading of the minutes from the March meeting. Mrs. Woodstock asked for a motion to accept the minutes.
Mrs. Blickensderfer pointed out that “blithering” is spelled with only one r.
Mrs. Woodstock asked for a motion to accept the minutes as amended. The motion was made by Mrs. Voss and seconded by Mr. Fox, and carried by a vote of 7 to 1.
Under Old Business, Pastor Hamilton mentioned that the light bulb in his pulpit reading lamp is still burned out. Mrs. Woodstock asked him whether that was the reason he had embarrassed the whole congregation during the Psalm last Sunday. Pastor Hamilton answered that it was.
Mrs. Blickensderfer said she thought the light-bulb problem had been remanded to the Building Committee.
Mr. Sholes said that no record of any such remandment appeared in the minutes of the March meeting.
Mrs. Blickensderfer said she didn’t think “remandment” was a word.
Mr. Fox thought that the pulpit was under the jurisdiction of the Worship and Music Committee.
Mrs. Yost thought that the lighting was the responsibility of the Evangelism Committee.
Mr. Fox wanted to know what sort of dunderhead thought lighting had anything to do with evangelism.
Mrs. Woodstock pointed out that it made no difference, since the Building Committee, the Worship and Music Committee, and the Evangelism Committee were all Mrs. Voss.
Mrs. Voss answered that she didn’t know anything about electricity, and if people wanted her to take care of something they should tell her about it instead of expecting her to read their minds.
Mr. Dhiatensor said something in the language he speaks, which we think might be Portuguese.
Pastor Hamilton said that the replacement of a light bulb was really a very simple matter, and that he would have taken care of it himself except that the last time he bought something for the church he was informed that he could not be reimbursed unless the expense had the prior approval of Council.
Mrs. Woodstock asked him whether he really believed that Council would have given its prior approval for an espresso machine.
Pastor Hamilton thought Council would have, since the machine was essential to his continued effectiveness as a minister of the Word.
Mrs. Woodstock asked him whether he believed in the Tooth Fairy as well.
Mr. Sholes said that the matter under discussion was the light bulb, and not the espresso machine, which had already been discussed at length at the January meeting.
Mrs. Voss was of the opinion that someone should just go out and get a light bulb and be done with it.
Mrs. Woodstock asked her whether she was volunteering.
Mrs. Voss repeated that she didn’t know anything about electricity.
Mrs. Blickensderfer asked whether the church didn’t have any spare light bulbs sitting around in the closet.
Pastor Hamilton reminded Council that the lamp in the pulpit uses a halogen bulb, and thus ordinary spare light bulbs are of no use.
Mrs. Woodstock thought that the next time the church bought a lamp, someone ought to make sure it took regular light bulbs like normal people use.
Pastor Hamilton said that there were many advantages to halogen bulbs.
Mr. Dhiatensor became very agitated and spoke rapidly about something, then stomped out of the room.
Mrs. Voss wondered whether “halogen” meant something obscene in Spanish.
Mrs. Yost said that she had always thought he was speaking Romanian.
Mrs. Blickensderfer said that at any rate someone ought to apologize to him, because Mr. Dhiatensor seemed like such a nice man.
Mr. Fox moved that Council convey its apologies to Mr. Dhiatensor for inadvertently offending him. The motion was seconded by Mrs. Blickensderfer, and carried by a vote of 7 to 1.
Mr. Sholes asked who was going to write the letter.
Mrs. Woodstock thought that would be the responsibility of the Worship and Music Committee.
Mrs. Voss said that she didn’t know Spanish, and anyway she couldn’t type.
Mrs. Woodstock said, fine, she would write the letter herself.
Mrs. Yost moved that Council authorize Mrs. Woodstock to write a letter of apology to Mr. Dhiatensor on behalf of Council. The motion was seconded by Mrs. Voss and carried by a vote of 7 to 1.
Mrs. Woodstock asked Mrs. Underwood if she would mind explaining, purely for Council’s information, why she had to vote no on every damn motion.
Mrs. Underwood said that it was quite clear that no one else on Council cared about the health of the congregation, which was threatened daily by an onslaught of communicable diseases.
Mrs. Woodstock said that the vote on a new hand dryer for the women’s restroom had been taken in February, and most of Council had decided that paper towels were good enough for them.
Mrs. Underwood said that was fine, but they shouldn’t expect her to cooperate with a Council that didn’t care if the entire congregation died of bird flu.
Pastor Hamilton asked whether any decision had been reached in the matter of the light bulb.
Mr. Fox said he didn’t think so.
Mr. Sholes said that the problem was figuring out what sort of bulb the lamp used.
Mrs. Voss suggested that someone could just take the old bulb to a store and find one like it, although she added that she herself didn’t know anything about electricity.
Mrs. Woodstock asked for a motion to authorize someone to go to the hardware store with the bulb, and come back with a new one.
Mr. Sholes said the problem with that was that no one knew how much a new bulb would cost, and until Council knew the cost it would be impossible to authorize the expense.
Mrs. Woodstock asked him what he would suggest.
Mr. Sholes suggested that an ad hoc committee could take the bulb to the hardware store, obtain the information about how much it would cost to replace, and report the cost to the next meeting of Council. Otherwise he didn’t see how it would be possible to authorize the expense.
Mrs. Woodstock asked him whether he would be willing to be part of the ad hoc committee. Mr. Sholes said that he would, and suggested that Mr. Fox would be a good second member.
Mr. Fox explained that, for reasons he would rather not discuss, he was no longer welcome at Blandville Hardware.
Mrs. Yost volunteered to go with Mr. Sholes to the hardware store, if he promised not to exceed the speed limit on State Street.
Mrs. Woodstock asked for a motion to form an ad hoc exploratory committee consisting of Mr. Sholes and Mrs. Yost for the purpose of taking the burnt-out light bulb to Blandville Hardware and finding out how much it would cost to replace, the cost to be reported to Council at the May meeting, at which time Council would be in a position to be able to authorize the expense of a new light bulb.
The motion was made by Mrs. Voss and seconded by Mr. Fox, and carried by a vote of 7 to 1.
Christopher Bailey , a Lutheran, writes about everything from Arthurian mythology to wireless networking. He spent a decade on the Upward Path in corporate America, but now must be counted among the backsliders.
“The Minister’s Cabinet” first appeared in the June, 2007 issue of Touchstone.
(Christopher Bailey reports the Minutes of the April Council Meeting at St. Barnabas Lutheran Church, Blandville)
Mrs. Woodstock called the meeting to order at 7:12 P.M., Pastor Hamilton having been delayed by an unusually long line at Starbucks. The meeting began with the reading of the minutes from the March meeting. Mrs. Woodstock asked for a motion to accept the minutes.
Mrs. Blickensderfer pointed out that “blithering” is spelled with only one r.
Mrs. Woodstock asked for a motion to accept the minutes as amended. The motion was made by Mrs. Voss and seconded by Mr. Fox, and carried by a vote of 7 to 1.
Under Old Business, Pastor Hamilton mentioned that the light bulb in his pulpit reading lamp is still burned out. Mrs. Woodstock asked him whether that was the reason he had embarrassed the whole congregation during the Psalm last Sunday. Pastor Hamilton answered that it was.
Mrs. Blickensderfer said she thought the light-bulb problem had been remanded to the Building Committee.
Mr. Sholes said that no record of any such remandment appeared in the minutes of the March meeting.
Mrs. Blickensderfer said she didn’t think “remandment” was a word.
Mr. Fox thought that the pulpit was under the jurisdiction of the Worship and Music Committee.
Mrs. Yost thought that the lighting was the responsibility of the Evangelism Committee.
Mr. Fox wanted to know what sort of dunderhead thought lighting had anything to do with evangelism.
Mrs. Woodstock pointed out that it made no difference, since the Building Committee, the Worship and Music Committee, and the Evangelism Committee were all Mrs. Voss.
Mrs. Voss answered that she didn’t know anything about electricity, and if people wanted her to take care of something they should tell her about it instead of expecting her to read their minds.
Mr. Dhiatensor said something in the language he speaks, which we think might be Portuguese.
Pastor Hamilton said that the replacement of a light bulb was really a very simple matter, and that he would have taken care of it himself except that the last time he bought something for the church he was informed that he could not be reimbursed unless the expense had the prior approval of Council.
Mrs. Woodstock asked him whether he really believed that Council would have given its prior approval for an espresso machine.
Pastor Hamilton thought Council would have, since the machine was essential to his continued effectiveness as a minister of the Word.
Mrs. Woodstock asked him whether he believed in the Tooth Fairy as well.
Mr. Sholes said that the matter under discussion was the light bulb, and not the espresso machine, which had already been discussed at length at the January meeting.
Mrs. Voss was of the opinion that someone should just go out and get a light bulb and be done with it.
Mrs. Woodstock asked her whether she was volunteering.
Mrs. Voss repeated that she didn’t know anything about electricity.
Mrs. Blickensderfer asked whether the church didn’t have any spare light bulbs sitting around in the closet.
Pastor Hamilton reminded Council that the lamp in the pulpit uses a halogen bulb, and thus ordinary spare light bulbs are of no use.
Mrs. Woodstock thought that the next time the church bought a lamp, someone ought to make sure it took regular light bulbs like normal people use.
Pastor Hamilton said that there were many advantages to halogen bulbs.
Mr. Dhiatensor became very agitated and spoke rapidly about something, then stomped out of the room.
Mrs. Voss wondered whether “halogen” meant something obscene in Spanish.
Mrs. Yost said that she had always thought he was speaking Romanian.
Mrs. Blickensderfer said that at any rate someone ought to apologize to him, because Mr. Dhiatensor seemed like such a nice man.
Mr. Fox moved that Council convey its apologies to Mr. Dhiatensor for inadvertently offending him. The motion was seconded by Mrs. Blickensderfer, and carried by a vote of 7 to 1.
Mr. Sholes asked who was going to write the letter.
Mrs. Woodstock thought that would be the responsibility of the Worship and Music Committee.
Mrs. Voss said that she didn’t know Spanish, and anyway she couldn’t type.
Mrs. Woodstock said, fine, she would write the letter herself.
Mrs. Yost moved that Council authorize Mrs. Woodstock to write a letter of apology to Mr. Dhiatensor on behalf of Council. The motion was seconded by Mrs. Voss and carried by a vote of 7 to 1.
Mrs. Woodstock asked Mrs. Underwood if she would mind explaining, purely for Council’s information, why she had to vote no on every damn motion.
Mrs. Underwood said that it was quite clear that no one else on Council cared about the health of the congregation, which was threatened daily by an onslaught of communicable diseases.
Mrs. Woodstock said that the vote on a new hand dryer for the women’s restroom had been taken in February, and most of Council had decided that paper towels were good enough for them.
Mrs. Underwood said that was fine, but they shouldn’t expect her to cooperate with a Council that didn’t care if the entire congregation died of bird flu.
Pastor Hamilton asked whether any decision had been reached in the matter of the light bulb.
Mr. Fox said he didn’t think so.
Mr. Sholes said that the problem was figuring out what sort of bulb the lamp used.
Mrs. Voss suggested that someone could just take the old bulb to a store and find one like it, although she added that she herself didn’t know anything about electricity.
Mrs. Woodstock asked for a motion to authorize someone to go to the hardware store with the bulb, and come back with a new one.
Mr. Sholes said the problem with that was that no one knew how much a new bulb would cost, and until Council knew the cost it would be impossible to authorize the expense.
Mrs. Woodstock asked him what he would suggest.
Mr. Sholes suggested that an ad hoc committee could take the bulb to the hardware store, obtain the information about how much it would cost to replace, and report the cost to the next meeting of Council. Otherwise he didn’t see how it would be possible to authorize the expense.
Mrs. Woodstock asked him whether he would be willing to be part of the ad hoc committee. Mr. Sholes said that he would, and suggested that Mr. Fox would be a good second member.
Mr. Fox explained that, for reasons he would rather not discuss, he was no longer welcome at Blandville Hardware.
Mrs. Yost volunteered to go with Mr. Sholes to the hardware store, if he promised not to exceed the speed limit on State Street.
Mrs. Woodstock asked for a motion to form an ad hoc exploratory committee consisting of Mr. Sholes and Mrs. Yost for the purpose of taking the burnt-out light bulb to Blandville Hardware and finding out how much it would cost to replace, the cost to be reported to Council at the May meeting, at which time Council would be in a position to be able to authorize the expense of a new light bulb.
The motion was made by Mrs. Voss and seconded by Mr. Fox, and carried by a vote of 7 to 1.
Christopher Bailey , a Lutheran, writes about everything from Arthurian mythology to wireless networking. He spent a decade on the Upward Path in corporate America, but now must be counted among the backsliders.
“The Minister’s Cabinet” first appeared in the June, 2007 issue of Touchstone.
Saturday, June 09, 2007
Friday, June 08, 2007
Brilliant? Or stupid?
A thought I had today in the grocery store: When I can't find an item, let me send a text message to the grocery store saying, "pizza sauce" and get an immediate reply saying, "Aisle 15 B."
Brilliant Idea
In an effort to fight illegal advertising, city workers now paint, "Cancelled" over concert advertisments. If everyone thinks the concert is cancelled, there is not incentive to put up illegal advertisements.
Thursday, June 07, 2007
Even if he's telling the truth, it's still a weird story.
When asked if he had a sexual relationship with the driver, Johnson said: "It's probably out of bounds, but the answer is no. Obviously, if I had a sexual relationship with this individual, I'd know it was a man, wouldn't I? I'm not interested in men, period."
Wednesday, June 06, 2007
A good story on a bear attack
Remember when the father and daughter got attacked by a griz in Glacier last year? This is their story from the Missoulian.
Monday, June 04, 2007
Sunday, June 03, 2007
Saturday, June 02, 2007
Thursday, May 31, 2007
Watch Your Kids
Last week, eight Tibetan monks were halfway complete with an incredibly intricate sand mandala they were creating in Kansas City's Union Station when a young boy went under the protective rope and messed up the entire design. The monks were gone when it happened but the episode was caught on a security camera
Today In History
Do you know what happened this week back in 1850?
California became a state.
The State had no electricity.
The State had no money.
Almost everyone spoke Spanish.
There were gunfights in the streets.
Basically, it was just like California today, except the women had real tits and the men didn't hold hands.
California became a state.
The State had no electricity.
The State had no money.
Almost everyone spoke Spanish.
There were gunfights in the streets.
Basically, it was just like California today, except the women had real tits and the men didn't hold hands.
Tuesday, May 29, 2007
The Big Album Cover-up
Here's a quiz to challenge even the most devout music fan. Following are 15 of the biggest-selling albums in music history. In fact, all of these have sold at least 10 million copies in the United States alone.
The trick? We've left some of the covers as they originally were, but altered others by reversing the photos or images on them. Your goal is to identify which ones are "kosher" and which are "bogus."
Good luck!
(I got a 67% - what do I know about a Jewel album cover?)
Monday, May 28, 2007
Imagine if Montana only had 21 places to buy booze outside of a bar.
It would be Utah. Read the article to understand why Utah sucks.
100 reasons to love John Wayne on his 100th Birthday
69. "Fill your hand, you son of a bitch!" (True Grit).
70. Because he never had a sense of entitlement toward his career.
71. Because until middle age, he would do most of his stunts himself.
74. Because he loved dogs, and not the ones you'd think. He had springer spaniels and dachshunds.
75. Because he could suggest a terrible sorrow beneath a heroic exterior.
76. Because the dog in Hondo was actually played by Lassie, and when he won the dog in a card game from trainer Rudd Weatherwax, he gave him back.
80. "I stopped getting the girl about 10 years ago. Which is just as well, because I'd forgotten what I wanted her for."
82. "I never had a (expletive) artistic problem in my life, never, and I've worked with the best of them."
84. Because his favorite drink was tequila.
86. For the graceful way he confronted the disease that was already taking his life in The Shootist.
87. Because when he was dying of cancer, in excruciating pain, he never complained.
70. Because he never had a sense of entitlement toward his career.
71. Because until middle age, he would do most of his stunts himself.
74. Because he loved dogs, and not the ones you'd think. He had springer spaniels and dachshunds.
75. Because he could suggest a terrible sorrow beneath a heroic exterior.
76. Because the dog in Hondo was actually played by Lassie, and when he won the dog in a card game from trainer Rudd Weatherwax, he gave him back.
80. "I stopped getting the girl about 10 years ago. Which is just as well, because I'd forgotten what I wanted her for."
82. "I never had a (expletive) artistic problem in my life, never, and I've worked with the best of them."
84. Because his favorite drink was tequila.
86. For the graceful way he confronted the disease that was already taking his life in The Shootist.
87. Because when he was dying of cancer, in excruciating pain, he never complained.
Saturday, May 26, 2007
Want It!
Radio-controlled Water Cannons
Engage in soaking skirmishes with this Radio-controlled Water Cannon. Adults and kids alike will delight in these high-quality pool toys.
Full-function radio controller lets you direct these power soakers to target poolside opponents
Water cannon's nozzle can move up and down
Stream of water bursts as high as 10'
Moves forward, backward, or spins for a sneak attack
HOW TO STAY AWAKE IN TEACHER IN-SERVICES:
HOW TO STAY AWAKE IN TEACHER IN-SERVICES:
Do you keep falling asleep in teacher meetings and in-services?
Here's a way to change all of that.
1. Before (or during) your next meeting, in-service, or staff development, prepare yourself by drawing a square. I find that 5" x 5" is a good size.
Divide the card into columns-five across and five down. That will give you 25 one-inch blocks.
2. Write one of the following words/phrases in each block:
* No Child Left Behind (NCLB)
* test scores
* core competencies
* communication
* proficiency
* standards
* multiple exposures
* benchmarks
* proactive
* win-win
* think outside the box
* action plan
* result-driven
* assessments
* knowledge base
* at the end of the day
* touch base
* mindset
* differentiated
* retention
* skills
* background knowledge
* effective learning
* exemplars
* implementation
* reflection
* grade level expectations (GLE's)
* alpha plus
* benchmark testing
* CRT's
* intervention
* Adaquate Yearly Progress (AYP)
3. Check off the appropriate block when you hear one of those words/phrases.
4. When you get five blocks horizontally, vertically, or diagonally stand up and shout "BULLSHIT!"
TESTIMONIALS from satisfied "Bullshit Bingo" players:
-- "I had been in the meeting for only five minutes when I won." - Adam W., Atlanta
-- "My attention span at in-services has improved dramatically." - David T., Orlando
-- "What a gas! Staff Development will never be the same for me after my first win." - Dan J., New York City
-- "The atmosphere was tense in the last in-service as 14 of us waited for the fifth box." - Ben G, Denver
-- "The speaker was stunned as eight of us screamed 'BULLSHIT!' for the third time in two hours. The Bullshit Bingo Championship will be played at the next in-service." -Rod H., Nashville
Do you keep falling asleep in teacher meetings and in-services?
Here's a way to change all of that.
1. Before (or during) your next meeting, in-service, or staff development, prepare yourself by drawing a square. I find that 5" x 5" is a good size.
Divide the card into columns-five across and five down. That will give you 25 one-inch blocks.
2. Write one of the following words/phrases in each block:
* No Child Left Behind (NCLB)
* test scores
* core competencies
* communication
* proficiency
* standards
* multiple exposures
* benchmarks
* proactive
* win-win
* think outside the box
* action plan
* result-driven
* assessments
* knowledge base
* at the end of the day
* touch base
* mindset
* differentiated
* retention
* skills
* background knowledge
* effective learning
* exemplars
* implementation
* reflection
* grade level expectations (GLE's)
* alpha plus
* benchmark testing
* CRT's
* intervention
* Adaquate Yearly Progress (AYP)
3. Check off the appropriate block when you hear one of those words/phrases.
4. When you get five blocks horizontally, vertically, or diagonally stand up and shout "BULLSHIT!"
TESTIMONIALS from satisfied "Bullshit Bingo" players:
-- "I had been in the meeting for only five minutes when I won." - Adam W., Atlanta
-- "My attention span at in-services has improved dramatically." - David T., Orlando
-- "What a gas! Staff Development will never be the same for me after my first win." - Dan J., New York City
-- "The atmosphere was tense in the last in-service as 14 of us waited for the fifth box." - Ben G, Denver
-- "The speaker was stunned as eight of us screamed 'BULLSHIT!' for the third time in two hours. The Bullshit Bingo Championship will be played at the next in-service." -Rod H., Nashville
Better Science
UCLA STUDY - A study conducted by UCLA's Department of Psychiatry has revealed that the kind of face a woman finds attractive on a man can differ depending on where she is in her menstrual cycle. For example: If she is ovulating, she is attracted to men with rugged and masculine features. However, if she is menstruating or menopausal, she tends to be more attracted to a man with duct tape over his mouth and a spear lodged in his
chest while he is on fire.
No further studies are expected.
chest while he is on fire.
No further studies are expected.
I had a dream . . .
I sat with an older woman at a club last night. She was in great shape for 55; we drank a bit, had a bit of a conversation and she asked if I'd ever had the Sportsman's Double:- a mother and daughter threesome?
I said no. We drank a bit more, then she says that tonight was my lucky night. I went back to her house.
She put the hall light on and shouted upstairs...
"Hey mom, are you awake?'
I said no. We drank a bit more, then she says that tonight was my lucky night. I went back to her house.
She put the hall light on and shouted upstairs...
"Hey mom, are you awake?'
Wednesday, May 23, 2007
You go first.
Nosefrida is a doctor recommended nasal aspirator that removes mucous from your child’s nose. It was invented in Sweden by Ear, Nose and Throat Specialists, and has been used by Swedish Moms and Dads for years.
Tuesday, May 22, 2007
What's my dog - solving the mystery of Nica
The Wisdom Panel™ MX Mixed Breed Analysis is the most comprehensive DNA-based mixed breed test for dogs. It identifies more than 130 AKC-recognized breeds that may be present in mixed breed dogs and will allow veterinarians to answer one of the most frequently asked questions by pet owners, "What is my dog's breed mix?"
How much malamute does she have? Any wolf?
How much malamute does she have? Any wolf?
Saturday, May 19, 2007
Thursday, May 17, 2007
How to beat the stock market.
Invest in companies with good customer service ratings.
Hint - Don't buy Wells Fargo or Qwest.
Hint - Don't buy Wells Fargo or Qwest.
Tuesday, May 15, 2007
Want It!
Record, Play, Stream, Share your digital content between your PC/internet, entertainment center (TV, DVR, DVD, etc…) and portables (iPod, smartphones, PSP, etc…)
Digitally record TV programs, DVD’s, home movies etc directly onto portables, PC, or memory cards for playback on the go or for time-shifting TV.
Connect to your network to play, stream, share PC and Internet content on TV or home stereo. Most popular formats supported.
USB Host and card memory slots to record directly onto external USB Hard Drives, USB thumbdrives or standard flash memory cards (CF, SD, Memory Sticks)
Free downloadable upgrades developed with the help of worldwide open source community.
Monday, May 14, 2007
Why Bill Richardson is a better presidential candidate than Billary.
Unlike HIllary or Obama, he has a sense of humor and some actual credentials.
How to combat an ear worm - use at your own risk!
Are you plagued by Stuck Tune Syndrome? Do you have a song stuck in your head you just can't get out? Take heart friend, for your suffering is over.
The Maimograph Machine, through complex analysis and calculation, will find an even catchier tune to counter-act the one you already have.
Sunday, May 13, 2007
Chico 2007
Underwater self-portraiture is easy . . .
when you open your eyes.
The pool at 6:30 a.m.
Chico Golf Team, from shortest to tallest.
when you open your eyes.
The pool at 6:30 a.m.
Chico Golf Team, from shortest to tallest.
I found a new job I want.
"There are only three things I'm afraid of in life. Heights, flying and . . "
Two jokes
What do you call a guy with a shovel in his head?
Doug.
What do you call a guy without a shovel in his head?
Douglas.
Doug.
What do you call a guy without a shovel in his head?
Douglas.
Thursday, May 10, 2007
WORLD WAR II ANTI-VD POSTER FEATURING DONALD DUCK.
This rare poster is the only one we know of and we believe of Australian issue. Text at top reads "And Me With Out A Pro.! Be Sly VD Is High." Great art depicts Donald Duck in an Australian soldier's uniform while behind him is an attractive woman in a tight slinky dress lying in wait behind a large plant. Donald has an exasperated look on his face as he is without a prophylactic.
Wednesday, May 09, 2007
Heard about pink meth? Maybe it's an old story.
WICHITA, Kan. — It may fall a shade shy of catching thieves red-handed, but for farmers fed up with methamphetamine (search) cooks filching their fertilizer, staining them pink will do just fine.
Assuming you can discourage thieves you cannot easily catch, a new product called GloTell — which is added to tanks of anhydrous ammonia — will not only besmirch the hands of those who touch the fertilizer, but leaves its mark on anyone who snorts or shoots the end product.
And in the two years it took to develop GloTell, researchers at Southern Illinois University-Carbondale found it did much more than just stain thieves pink.
The visible stain, even if washed off, was still detectable by ultraviolet light 24 to 72 hours later. As an added benefit, the additive helped farmers detect any tank leaks, said Truitt Clements, spokesman for Illinois-based GloTell Distributors LLC.
Best of all, the treated anhydrous ammonia rendered any meth it was used to make extremely difficult to dry and turned it an unbleachable pink, he said.
Assuming you can discourage thieves you cannot easily catch, a new product called GloTell — which is added to tanks of anhydrous ammonia — will not only besmirch the hands of those who touch the fertilizer, but leaves its mark on anyone who snorts or shoots the end product.
And in the two years it took to develop GloTell, researchers at Southern Illinois University-Carbondale found it did much more than just stain thieves pink.
The visible stain, even if washed off, was still detectable by ultraviolet light 24 to 72 hours later. As an added benefit, the additive helped farmers detect any tank leaks, said Truitt Clements, spokesman for Illinois-based GloTell Distributors LLC.
Best of all, the treated anhydrous ammonia rendered any meth it was used to make extremely difficult to dry and turned it an unbleachable pink, he said.
Tuesday, May 08, 2007
It's so nice always being 13 years old and male.
I was just forced to register on a site to get content.
So my registration name is, "Mr. Penis Lengthexceedsimagination."
I so hope they call me.
So my registration name is, "Mr. Penis Lengthexceedsimagination."
I so hope they call me.
Monday, May 07, 2007
Dear Abby
Dear Abby,
I've never written to you before, but I really need your advice. I have suspected for some time now that my wife has been cheating on me. The usual signs......... phone rings but if I answer, the caller hangs up. My wife has been going out with the girls a lot recently although when I ask their
names she always says, "Just some friends from work, you don't know them."
I always try to stay awake to look out for her coming home, but I usually fall asleep. Anyway, I have never approached the subject with my wife. I think deep down I just didn't want to know the truth, but last night shewent out again and I decided to really check on her.
Around midnight, I decided to hide in the garage behind my golf clubs so I could get a good view of the whole street when she arrived home from a night out with "the girls". It was at that moment, crouching behind my clubs, that I noticed that the graphite shaft on my driver appeared to have a hairline crack right by the club head. Is this something I can fix myself or should I take it back to the pro shop where I bought it?
I've never written to you before, but I really need your advice. I have suspected for some time now that my wife has been cheating on me. The usual signs......... phone rings but if I answer, the caller hangs up. My wife has been going out with the girls a lot recently although when I ask their
names she always says, "Just some friends from work, you don't know them."
I always try to stay awake to look out for her coming home, but I usually fall asleep. Anyway, I have never approached the subject with my wife. I think deep down I just didn't want to know the truth, but last night shewent out again and I decided to really check on her.
Around midnight, I decided to hide in the garage behind my golf clubs so I could get a good view of the whole street when she arrived home from a night out with "the girls". It was at that moment, crouching behind my clubs, that I noticed that the graphite shaft on my driver appeared to have a hairline crack right by the club head. Is this something I can fix myself or should I take it back to the pro shop where I bought it?
Saturday, May 05, 2007
My neighbor's cats better watch out.
Police are seeking the vandals who spray-painted the words "Go Home" on a Samoan Shepherd who enjoys wandering, unleashed, though its Idaho neighborhood.
Thursday, May 03, 2007
Happy Birthday
Monica Lewinsky turns 31 this week. Can you believe it?
It seems like only yesterday she was crawling around the White House on her hands and knees.
They grow up so fast . . .
Wednesday, May 02, 2007
How to use your HDTV
"I was watching an episode from the second season (1958-59) of "Leave It to Beaver" tonight when I got to the part where Ward reads a note from Beaver's principal, Mrs. Rayburn. If you freeze-frame the note it says:
Mr. Ward Cleaver
485 Mapleton Drive
Mayfield, State
My Dear Mr. Cleaver:
This paragraph has absolutely nothing to do with anything.
It is here merely to fill up space. Still, it is words,
rather than repeated letters, since the latter might not
give the proper appearance, namely, that of an actual note."
Follow the link for more information.
Tuesday, May 01, 2007
4/29 Truth.com
Unlike the World Trade Center, the 580/980/880/80 overpass was reinforced against earthquakes and was not under the enormous compressive load that the towers were when they fell. The overpass was designed to support gridlocked traffic in an earthquake, but it collapsed without even a single car on it. The fire consumed only 8,600 gallons of fuel, whereas the WTC was allegedly brought down by 24,000 gallons of fuel. Does Governor Schwarzenegger really expect us to believe a story even more preposterous than the already-discredited official story about 9/11? To answer the question “Who is responsible for this terrible tragedy?” we must ask who stood to gain the most. George Soros? The California Department of Transportation? The Jews?
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