When you realize how perfect everything is you will tilt your head back and laugh at the sky.
Tuesday, October 31, 2006
Yes, they flunked a test.
"Test results are not a grade or a scorecard; they are a road map to perpetual improvement; any other characterization is simply misleading. We have to challenge ourselves to do better every day and be relentless in that pursuit."
2006 Things to Do - Visit all of Montana's breweries
Saturday, October 28, 2006
Friday, October 27, 2006
A light at the end of the tunnel
Currently Daylight Savings Time starts on the first Sunday in April and ends on the last Sunday in October. Beginning in 2007, DST will start on the second Sunday in March (March 11, 2007), and change back to standard time on the first Sunday in November (November 4, 2007).
Everyone knows Rush Limbaugh's just faking
"Now, I know this may offend those who suffer from this particular condition, and these individuals might not like it much when I suggest that a certain person with this diagnosis is exaggerating his symptoms, but I have to say, I think Rush Limbaugh is just pretending to be a dick."
Thursday, October 26, 2006
Friday night I'm going to . . . Bat Boy The Musical
How many people share your name?
There are 49,535 people named John Smith in the United States. There are 1,048 people named James Bond, 113 people named Harry Potter , 503 people named George Bush, and 31 people named Emily Dickinson. However, Johnny Cash (39 people) songs aside there are, statistically speaking, no boys named Sue.
What about you? How many people share your name? Enter it and find out how many of you there are.
(I have a total of three clones.)
What about you? How many people share your name? Enter it and find out how many of you there are.
(I have a total of three clones.)
Tuesday, October 24, 2006
Sunday, October 22, 2006
Friday, October 20, 2006
A letter to John Madden from the worst-rated player in Madden NFL 2007
"My horrible passer ratings are of greatest misfortune to my son, Red Beard Jr. The poor boy is not only hideously ugly and covered by freakishly large freckles. He also has to suffer through playing catch with me and my senile-elderly-woman-type passer ratings. A session of tossing the pigskin usually consists of me missing my son by thirty yards in sporadic directions."
Thursday, October 19, 2006
Orbital Etiquette
Don't look directly at the Sun. Don't play with your grape juice. And don't hog prime viewing space at the windows.
This was the advice several astronauts and space doctors gave to prospective space tourists on Tuesday at the International Symposium for Personal Spaceflight in Las Cruces, New Mexico, US.
This was the advice several astronauts and space doctors gave to prospective space tourists on Tuesday at the International Symposium for Personal Spaceflight in Las Cruces, New Mexico, US.
Tuesday, October 17, 2006
Sunday, October 15, 2006
No wonder our perception of beauty is distorted.
Friday, October 13, 2006
Thursday, October 12, 2006
Skeleton Soap
Monday, October 09, 2006
Stupid addicting game
"Throw Leonardo the Elephant as far and high as you can. Make swing the ballon with the air fan and click to detach the rope."
Sunday, October 08, 2006
Saturday, October 07, 2006
Tuesday, October 03, 2006
The Fisherman and The Investment Banker
An American investment banker was at the pier of a small coastal Mexican village when a small boat with just one fisherman docked. Inside the small boat were several large yellow fin tuna. The American complimented the Mexican on the quality of his fish and asked how long it took to catch them.
The fisherman replied, only a little while.
The American then asked why didn't he stay out longer and catch more fish?
The Mexican said he had enough to support his family's immediate needs.
The American then asked, "But what do you do with the rest of your time?"
The Mexican fisherman said, "I sleep late, fish a little, play with my children, take siesta with my wife, Maria, stroll into the village each evening where I sip wine and play guitar with my amigos, I have a full and busy life."
The American scoffed, "I am a Harvard MBA and could help you. You should spend more time fishing and with the proceeds, buy a bigger boat with the proceeds from the bigger boat you could buy several boats, eventually you would have a fleet of fishing boats. Instead of selling your catch to a middleman you would sell directly to the processor, eventually opening your own cannery. You would control the product, processing and distribution. You would need to leave this small coastal fishing village and move to Mexico City, then LA and eventually NYC where you will run your expanding enterprise."
The Mexican fisherman asked, "But, how long will this all take?"
To which the American replied, "15-20 years."
The Mexican fisherman asked, "But what then?"
The American laughed and said that's the best part. "When the time is right you would announce an IPO and sell your company stock to the public and become very rich, you would make millions."
"Millions.. Then what?"
The American said, "Then you would retire. Move to a small coastal fishing village where you would sleep late, fish a little, play with your kids, take siesta with your wife, stroll to the village in the evenings where you could sip wine and play your guitar with your amigos."
The fisherman replied, only a little while.
The American then asked why didn't he stay out longer and catch more fish?
The Mexican said he had enough to support his family's immediate needs.
The American then asked, "But what do you do with the rest of your time?"
The Mexican fisherman said, "I sleep late, fish a little, play with my children, take siesta with my wife, Maria, stroll into the village each evening where I sip wine and play guitar with my amigos, I have a full and busy life."
The American scoffed, "I am a Harvard MBA and could help you. You should spend more time fishing and with the proceeds, buy a bigger boat with the proceeds from the bigger boat you could buy several boats, eventually you would have a fleet of fishing boats. Instead of selling your catch to a middleman you would sell directly to the processor, eventually opening your own cannery. You would control the product, processing and distribution. You would need to leave this small coastal fishing village and move to Mexico City, then LA and eventually NYC where you will run your expanding enterprise."
The Mexican fisherman asked, "But, how long will this all take?"
To which the American replied, "15-20 years."
The Mexican fisherman asked, "But what then?"
The American laughed and said that's the best part. "When the time is right you would announce an IPO and sell your company stock to the public and become very rich, you would make millions."
"Millions.. Then what?"
The American said, "Then you would retire. Move to a small coastal fishing village where you would sleep late, fish a little, play with your kids, take siesta with your wife, stroll to the village in the evenings where you could sip wine and play your guitar with your amigos."
Monday, October 02, 2006
1,313 Costumes from Target
A very cool graphic.
So long as you aren't look for anything in particular.
So long as you aren't look for anything in particular.
"We need to talk about your TPS reports."
Part of my CPR training today included the state form I have to fill out if I save someone's life at work.
Sunday, October 01, 2006
Urination to go to committee
"When boys are not allowed to pee in the natural way, the way boys have done for generations, it is meddling with God's work," Kleppe told the newspaper.
"It is a human right not to have to sit down like a girl," Kleppe said.
"It is a human right not to have to sit down like a girl," Kleppe said.
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